Keeping it going...

I went to a writer's conference several years ago, and it was fantastic! I remember that one of the speakers talked about the importance of doing something creative everyday in order to keep the juices flowing. While I totally agree and think that's an awesome idea, I have to confess and say that I don't always do that. I just get easily distracted with other things and the creative side of me gets shunted to the side.

I keep up with a certain unnamed television program, and I recently discovered a page that allows fan fiction. Now, if I were a snob, I'd just make fun of the sorry attempts that some people make, but really, at least they're writing! So, I've found myself submitting little things...it seems silly, but I can't help but remember that admonishment to do something creative everyday. So, that's my excuse...I'm stretching my creative muscles.

Creatively speaking

I see faces in the trees and dogs in the clouds and sometimes, when I look just so, it seems like there's a little man in the flowers. I have a pretty active imagination. I almost always see things that aren't there when I look at everyday objects. Don't worry; I'm not crazy. I think I'm just still attuned to that child I was once long ago. I have really vivid dreams as well. I really think these dreams and images are just reminders that I have this well of creativity in me dying to be released onto the page. I just have to open the floodgates and believe that I can do it. That I have it in me to write something interesting, something that will impact those who read it. I don't always feel that way. Too often I criticize myself for not writing the way others write...either in style or in usage. But, isn't God a creative god? Doesn't he like creativity in the world? Look at all the different people that populate this earth. We are all so unique. Perhaps my dreams are just a reminder that God has uniquely created me to be me.

Ladies Book Club

Some ladies and myself from church have started a little book club. This month we're trying our hands at a little mystery, old school: Agatha Christie. Agatha truly is the grand dame of mystery. We're reading Death on the Nile, and I'm finding it quite enjoyable.

Her style of writing flows quickly (she's all about the dialogue with very little extra exposition), and she's created a number of interesting characters. In fact, as of chapter 6 we still don't know who the victim is intended to be. We were able to spot a number of potential victims as well as potential murderers. This is shaping up to be one crazy, dangerous cruise down the Nile!

I love sitting around talking story with people, so this has been a great opportunity to enjoy a good book and deepen some friendships along the way. And, who knows, maybe I'll keep reading Agatha's books. She wrote over 80 stories!

Chapter 32: A new direction

I went back in my editing process of W.t.W.W.Y.N. and changed it up a bit. I also completely changed the direction of the story. Hopefully this will reap myriad benefits in character development and moving the plot along. My original #32 was boring and lacked energy. I felt like the characters had run out of steam a mere 50 feet from the finish line. That is not the way a story should feel. But, now with a little danger and fear, I've ramped up the story and given the characters more to do. I'm really hoping this will help me to push through to the end of this particular story. I want to know how this ends, and I want to see it happen. Soon.

To Cut or Not to Cut, that is the Question

When I pick up a story again after a bit of time has passed, I always have to edit. I see things I missed before, I realize that a particular thread isn't working or that maybe character x should behave a different way about character y. It's just a given. I'm always going to find things wrong. That's why I have to re-read with a eye to the fact that the story will never be perfect. It's just not possible.

However, there comes a time when I realize that a great (in my opinion) portion of the story just doesn't work, and I have to cut it out. But, then I reason, maybe I can put it somewhere else. Sometimes that works. I have a particular cut in mind right now, and I'm hoping that I can rearrange it in the text and put it somewhere else. It just seems like such a good moment between two characters. It seems to reveal their hearts. Unfortunately, it no longer really fits with what comes before it. I'm going to try to fit in before, make that moment come earlier in the prose.

It's a bit like life I suppose. Sometimes we just have to recognize that what we're doing isn't working. No amount of ignoring problems, finagling situations, or manipulating people is going to change the facts. We are messed up people and we need to rely on the Author and Perfecter of our lives to bring our story to a satisfactory conclusion.

So, I'm off to make a few snips, and I'll let you know what the finished product looks like.

A thoughtful re-read

Recently it has felt as though I've been awakening from a long slumber. I've just been so overwhelmed with life and the chaos of impending change and so I've slipped into a kind of placid here and now. I wasn't really living, just going from day to day trying to survive with a modicum of grace and poise. Some days I've definitely been more successful than others. What can I say? I'm human.

Just over a month ago now I went on a women's retreat at Windemere in the Ozarks. It turned out to be an amazing time for me to reconnect with what's truly important in life and to wake up. Life is about more than getting by...there's so much more that I want for myself. I want to feel alive and useful and joyous and here in the moment of every minute. That retreat served as the alarm clock of life telling me to get my butt out of bed and get moving. I have things to offer. I have a purpose. My purpose is more than sitting in front of the television or the internet medicating myself into this numb state of oblivion. Life is messy and it's vibrant, and I want to be more than an observer.

One of the casualties of my self-medicating, intoxicating addiction to doing nothing was my creativity and my writing. I have stories in me that are dying to come out. I have something to say...something that God planted in me when I was still in the womb. I have a beautiful dream, and I've squandered it these past few months (years?), and that's not the way to live.

I have prided myself on being an independent, go for broke woman of God who doesn't let fear stop me from what needs to happen. Yet, somewhere along the way, I've gotten sidetracked, in fact, that's not the woman I've been. I've been distracted by fear and anxiety. That's not who God has called me to be. In 1 Peter 5:7 he proclaims through Peter "...cast your anxieties on the Lord for he cares for you." He cares for me! How crazy is that? I know I have a hard time believing it sometimes, but nonetheless, it's true. God loves me and wants more for me than I want for myself. Thank you God.

So, I've been going through this awakening process, and so much of it comes down to my writing. I have what it takes. I am not a failure...I have to remind myself of that. For whatever reason, I haven't successfully published a novel yet, but that doesn't mean I should give up. I need to write.

I hadn't read When Broken Sparrows Fly since I last edited it a few years ago. I'm a harsh critic, and I only see the problems with it. But, I felt led to re-read the story this weekend. And, guess what? There are still flaws and it's not perfect, but it's not half-bad either. Certainly better than some stuff I've read, though nowhere near as good as I'd like it to be. But, maybe the point wasn't for me edit this story anymore, maybe it was to jumpstart my desire to write in general. I have more to say. I just need to kick myself in the pants, and start putting those thoughts down.

I'll let you know how things are going with that.

CRASH! BANG! BOOM!

I have finally decided on a life threatening incident for W.t.W.W.Y.N. I think I'm going for a bad guy induced car accident. Something big and bad that shakes up the direction of the story. I really needed something to throw the story into a new direction and shake up the characters. We'll see if this works.